A man can learn much from a distinguished gentleman such as Ron Burgundy. Successful career, an indescribable appeal to women and beautiful, beautiful hair – what’s not to like? Of course attaining such a magical combination is the tricky part and what separates the weak from the powerful. For those interested in pursuing such a holy grail, it would be worth your while reading on (while remembering to stay classy at all times).
On the importance of knowledge…
“With the exception of people, places, situations and dialogue, I’m like a walking encyclopedia of facts.”
On the impact of personal style…
“My hair was the principal cause for the overthrow of the Chilean government in ’73. … Look it up.”
On self deprecation…
“I don’t know how to put this but I’m kind of a big deal. People know me. I’m very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.”
On dealing with women…
“I wanna say something. I’m gonna put this out there: if you like it, you can take it. If you don’t, send it right back … I want to be ON you.”
On fighting…
“Some of our bar fights are now part of San Diego legend. They are the only bar fights I know of that have been given names: the Punch-’Em-Up of ’66, the Black-Eye Derby, the San Diego Bone Bonanza and many more. I will tell you this: Champ has no scruples whatsoever. He will kill a man, probably has, for no reason at all.”
On modesty…
“Mmm. I look good. I mean, really good. Hey, everyone! Come and see how good I look.”
On bears…
“Bears are not cool with disco lights and Donna Summer. That’s a bear fact not everyone knows.”